“He’d noticed that sex bore some resemblance to cookery: it fascinated people, they sometimes bought books full of complicated recipes and interesting pictures, and sometimes when they were really hungry they created vast banquets in their imagination – but at the end of the day they’d settle quite happily for egg and chips. If it was well done and maybe had a slice of tomato.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Fifth Elephant
“Balance. It was all about balance. That had been one of the first things that she had learned: the centre of the seesaw has neither up nor down, but upness and downness flow through it while it remains unmoved. You had to be the centre of the seesaw so the pain flowed through you, not into you. It was very hard. But she could do it!”
― Terry Pratchett, I Shall Wear Midnight
SUSAN J. PALMER, Aliens Adored
“There is a rumour going around that I have found God. I think this is unlikely because I have enough difficulty finding my keys, and there is empirical evidence that they exist.”
― Terry Pratchett
― Honoré de Balzac
“Once you’ve ruled out the impossible then whatever is left, however improbable, must be the truth. The problem lay in working out what was impossible, of course. That was the trick, all right. There was also the curious incident of the orangutan in the night-time.”
― Terry Pratchett, Guards! Guards!
― Terry Pratchett, Thud!
I had some dreams, they were clouds in my coffee.
― Terry Pratchett, A Hat Full of Sky
“And all your future lies beneath your hat.”
Leo The Great
He’d been an angel once. He hadn’t meant to Fall. He’d just hung around with the wrong people.”
― Terry Pratchett, Good Omens
― Angela Carter, Nights at the Circus
“No clowns were funny. That was the whole purpose of a clown. People laughed at clowns, but only out of nervousness. The point of clowns was that, after watching them, anything else that happened seemed enjoyable”
― Terry Pratchett, The City Watch Trilogy: A Discworld Omnibus.
― Jimmy Buffett
“This is a lovely party,” said the Bursar to a chair, “I wish I was here.”
― Terry Pratchett, Lords and Ladies